Episode #1
This is the first episode on Substack. The episodes will concentrate of the study of Spirituality and recovery from addictions, mainly alcohol. On September 20, 1976, I was introduced to AA and, in turn, AA introduced me to the study of Spirituality. I owe everything that I have today, including breathing in followed by out, to AA and the Spiritual practices it introduced me to. I encourage feedback because, after all, this is a WE program.
Hi. Welcome to Spirituality and Recovery. This episode #1 is called Spirituality and How It Has Affected My Recovery and, Thus, My Entire Life. My name is Jim Boylan and I will be your host.
When I came into the Program of AA, I had no religious or spiritual knowledge at all. My idea of God was that It was a being in human form sitting on a golden throne “up there somewhere, in heaven” judging and ordering punishment for transgressions, real or imagined, that I may or may not have committed.
Then, through any ministers that I heard, we were asked and pleaded with to contribute generously and often because of this or that need or desire, to make the church more beautiful or to help the “needy.”
For many years, we were the “needy,” just not knowing it and what we did know was that we couldn’t afford to up our monetary ante, even if we wanted to.
These were the same ministers who wanted us to believe that, in order for us to communicate with God, we had to pray AND go through them. So, when I came into the Program of AA, I seriously hesitated.
I quickly saw the references to God in the Big Book and the 12 Steps and recoiled. And, I let my apprehensions be known to the others.
I then heard from several of the members who I had known before they came into the program as hard drinking, hard fighting, hard everything just like me and were now telling me to relax.
They said that this was a spiritual program, not a religious program. I didn’t know the difference and didn’t believe that there even was one. Just word play again.
I didn’t know what this all meant but I also recalled hearing How it Works read before every meeting. In the 2nd paragraph, it said “If you want what we have and are willing to go to any lengths to get it, then welcome.”
I was at my bottom, not knowing that there was hope for me, let alone help. I wanted what they had. Knew that I was willing to do ANYTHING. To go to any lengths to get it. They also told me “Fake it till you make it.”
So I did. I faked believing that the Higher Power actually wanted to help me and was not going to judge me for my horrific past. I faked believing that He was actually going to forgive me for my past.
Very quickly, I noticed positive changes taking place in my life. I could go for longer periods of time without thinking of taking a drink. Many of the people around me, who I had considered a-holes, were turning pretty nice.
At least they were now tolerable. I started feeling better about myself. That I was not lower than snake poop. I had hope for maybe the first time in my life. It didn’t take long until I was no longer faking it.
I was getting regular demonstrations that a Higher Power of some kind was working with and through me. With each revelation like this, I only hungered for more so I looked into the Spiritual angle even deeper.
I absolutely loved what I saw and was feeling. My Higher Power, who I now choose to call God, was not “up there somewhere” judging and punishing me. He was in my heart, working through me and everyone I met.
I discovered that I didn’t have to like everyone, just as long as I loved them enough to see the Christ in them just like these former creatures that I was seeing at the AA meetings saw in me.
The others gave of themselves to me so that I could come up for air and see that I was not a worthless slug. Only one who just wanted hope. Today, I offer to give whatever I can so that others may see that there is hope.
Whodathunk that a word as short as HOPE would be so huge? You folks gave me hope and I want only that you can have it too, not only as deep-seated as it is for me but even more for you.
So, to answer the poser from the title, sobriety has given me a life that money can’t buy and a thief can’t steal. How did I get this sobriety? By surrendering to the spiritual portion of the AA Program.
By my working my program 24/7/365 to the best of my ability. By just doing the next right thing! How do I know if it is right? If I am doing the best that I can, if it feels right, it IS right! Simple as that! Don’t complicate it.
If you want what I have AND ARE WILLING TO GO TO ANY LENGTHS TO GET IT, THEN COD, Come On Down! If I could do this, you can and will too if you are willing to go to any lengths to get it. That is a promise!
Thank you, God!
Thank you for listening. I usually publish at least three times per week.
We are found on https://boylanj.substack.com/
Episode #1
This is the first episode on Substack. The episodes will concentrate of the study of Spirituality and recovery from addictions, mainly alcohol. On September 20, 1976, I was introduced to AA and, in turn, AA introduced me to the study of Spirituality. I owe everything that I have today, including breathing in followed by out, to AA and the Spiritual practices it introduced me to. I encourage feedback because, after all, this is a WE program.
Hi. Welcome to Spirituality and Recovery. This episode #1 is called Spirituality and How It Has Affected My Recovery and, Thus, My Entire Life. My name is Jim Boylan and I will be your host.
When I came into the Program of AA, I had no religious or spiritual knowledge at all. My idea of God was that It was a being in human form sitting on a golden throne “up there somewhere, in heaven” judging and ordering punishment for transgressions, real or imagined, that I may or may not have committed.
Then, through any ministers that I heard, we were asked and pleaded with to contribute generously and often because of this or that need or desire, to make the church more beautiful or to help the “needy.”
For many years, we were the “needy,” just not knowing it and what we did know was that we couldn’t afford to up our monetary ante, even if we wanted to.
These were the same ministers who wanted us to believe that, in order for us to communicate with God, we had to pray AND go through them. So, when I came into the Program of AA, I seriously hesitated.
I quickly saw the references to God in the Big Book and the 12 Steps and recoiled. And, I let my apprehensions be known to the others.
I then heard from several of the members who I had known before they came into the program as hard drinking, hard fighting, hard everything just like me and were now telling me to relax.
They said that this was a spiritual program, not a religious program. I didn’t know the difference and didn’t believe that there even was one. Just word play again.
I didn’t know what this all meant but I also recalled hearing How it Works read before every meeting. In the 2nd paragraph, it said “If you want what we have and are willing to go to any lengths to get it, then welcome.”
I was at my bottom, not knowing that there was hope for me, let alone help. I wanted what they had. Knew that I was willing to do ANYTHING. To go to any lengths to get it. They also told me “Fake it till you make it.”
So I did. I faked believing that the Higher Power actually wanted to help me and was not going to judge me for my horrific past. I faked believing that He was actually going to forgive me for my past.
Very quickly, I noticed positive changes taking place in my life. I could go for longer periods of time without thinking of taking a drink. Many of the people around me, who I had considered a-holes, were turning pretty nice.
At least they were now tolerable. I started feeling better about myself. That I was not lower than snake poop. I had hope for maybe the first time in my life. It didn’t take long until I was no longer faking it.
I was getting regular demonstrations that a Higher Power of some kind was working with and through me. With each revelation like this, I only hungered for more so I looked into the Spiritual angle even deeper.
I absolutely loved what I saw and was feeling. My Higher Power, who I now choose to call God, was not “up there somewhere” judging and punishing me. He was in my heart, working through me and everyone I met.
I discovered that I didn’t have to like everyone, just as long as I loved them enough to see the Christ in them just like these former creatures that I was seeing at the AA meetings saw in me.
The others gave of themselves to me so that I could come up for air and see that I was not a worthless slug. Only one who just wanted hope. Today, I offer to give whatever I can so that others may see that there is hope.
Whodathunk that a word as short as HOPE would be so huge? You folks gave me hope and I want only that you can have it too, not only as deep-seated as it is for me but even more for you.
So, to answer the poser from the title, sobriety has given me a life that money can’t buy and a thief can’t steal. How did I get this sobriety? By surrendering to the spiritual portion of the AA Program.
By my working my program 24/7/365 to the best of my ability. By just doing the next right thing! How do I know if it is right? If I am doing the best that I can, if it feels right, it IS right! Simple as that! Don’t complicate it.
If you want what I have AND ARE WILLING TO GO TO ANY LENGTHS TO GET IT, THEN COD, Come On Down! If I could do this, you can and will too if you are willing to go to any lengths to get it. That is a promise!
Thank you, God!
Thank you for listening. I usually publish at least three times per week.
We are found on https://boylanj.substack.com/
Ever Feeling So Low You Called Someone And Got Voicemail?